By Lauren Jarvis-Gibson
1. It takes us time to fall in love.
It takes us longer than the average person to fully fall in love because our anxiety makes us incredibly cautious. Our anxiety tells us that no one sane would ever fall in love with us back, and at times it can overpower our own thoughts.
2. We are guarded.
We guard our own hearts like they could be taken from us any second. We have been burned before and our anxiety makes us petrified that the person we care for will eventually hurt us.
3. We don’t trust him or her right off the bat.
It takes us awhile to open up to the person we are falling for. Why? Because our anxiety gives us reasons to feel paranoid even if there’s no reason to be. We want to trust them, but it takes us a really long time for that trust to even begin.
4. Sometimes even if we feel it, we can’t say it aloud.
To say ‘I love you’ is major for us. We only say it if we are 110% comfortable with this person. And even then, it’s a scary and vulnerable moment for us.
5. Sometimes we ignore the topic of the future all together.
We hate talking about the future because our anxiety can’t handle it. Anxiety makes us worry about what we are doing tomorrow, and we physically and emotionally can’t handle talking about the far away future. We try to ignore the topic as much as possible.
6. We sometimes come across as rude.
Sometimes we say rude things or completely ignore the person we love most because we want to see if they are going to leave. It’s our way of testing their love, as crazy as it sounds.
7. We pull away.
With anxiety comes a need to be alone and to isolate ourselves. When we are falling in love, this need is more urgent because our anxiety is usually on an all time high.
8. We fear the worst.
No matter how happy we are in the relationship, our anxiety makes us think it’s a joke. Anxiety makes us worry that this will all end. It tells us that the love isn’t even real or true and this person we love most will leave and never come back.
9. We don’t understand why they love us back.
We truly don’t understand why or how they love us. With anxiety comes a lot of hard times and baggage, and we can’t comprehend why they are sticking by us. This can cause a lot of tension in the relationship because all they ever do is convince you that they want you.
10. First dates are our nightmares.
To even begin dating is a struggle for us. First dates are extremely anxiety ridden events for us because we come up with thousands of horrible scenarios in our heads before the date even begins.
11. We become incredibly attached.
Once time has passed, and we are in a committed relationship, we become attached and clingy. Why? Because our anxiety tells us this relationship is temporary. So we hold onto to the feeling as this person as hard as we can. When we fall in love, we fall hard and to have it end is one of the worst things that could happen to us.